Metamorphosis

不多廢話，來跳舞！
一大早YouTube閒晃，看到一支很可愛的影片（the first clip），順手將Friends裡Ross跟Monica的routine找來，再加White Chicks裡妖精打群架。

Evolution of Dance

Dance on New Year's Eve

Bitchy Pandemonium

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孟子曰：「人之患，在好為人師。」此語不僅課堂受用，部落格亦是。
我常在別人家「找碴」，訂正錯字。學弟朱利安算我過去頭號受害者；＠ndy與安麻有幾次遇難；查算最近受波及的。我以為我單純指出錯誤無妨，但透過無聲的文字，口氣可能被解釋為批評。我絕無意如此。如有得罪，我誠心誠意道歉。
訂正，不在證明我比你優越；訂正，只是單純看到錯誤，好意提醒。當然，我不會說「今天你恨我，明天你會感謝我！」那種自詡的廢話，沒那麼偉大。還記得，我國小三年級老師特別嚴格，老把這句話掛在嘴邊。我現在對她再多感激都給這句話抹滅。
訂正，只是注意到你疏忽的小地方，沒有人因而一棒把你打死。訂正，不是修改你部落格心情；這是兩碼子事。訂正，不是要你違背當初寫作的moment；這不是錯別字的藉口。

別緊張，這篇不談基督；談衣服，而且還是Abercrombie & Fitch。【註一】
話說日前我在「什麼都有，什麼都賣，什麼都不奇怪！」的eBay，買了生平第一件A&F襯衫。先別罵我膚淺，我沒那本錢！這邊門市衣服加稅後，都很貴，所以能以在台灣買Hang Ten或Giordano襯衫的價錢買到A&F，還真的賺到了。【註二】
但這跟Faith到底有啥關係？就因為我買的是紅白相間，白條紋裡又鑲有綠細條紋的襯衫。想說聖誕節到了，衣櫃裡全是藍色的衣服，看了有點心寒，於是決定上網買件紅上衣，配上去年買的西藏風圍巾，討個喜氣。效果還不錯！
有耐心一點，重點快來了。你知道我喜歡Edgar Allan Poe，所以偶而會來想circumlocution，虐待讀者。淺白地說，就是beat around the brush，拐彎抹角；總是開門見山多無趣啊。

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想像你／想像你想什麼／想像你想像什麼／想像你想像我／想像你想像我想什麼／想像我想像你想什麼／想像你想像我想像你／想像我想像你想像我／想像我想像你／想像我想像什麼／想像我想什麼／想像我
這／就是真實？

Bjork - "Hyperballad"
We live on a mountain / Right at the top / There's a beautiful view / From the top of the mountain / Every morning I walk towards the edge / And throw little things off / Like: / Car parts, bottles and cutlery / Or whatever I find lying around / It's become a habit / A way / To start the day
I go through all this / Before you wake up / So I can feel happier / To be safe up here with you
It's early morning / No one is awake / I'm back at my cliff / Still throwing things off / I listen to the sounds they make / On their way down / I follow with my eyes 'til they crash / Imagine what my body would sound like / Slamming against those rocks / When it lands / Will my eyes / Be closed or open?

 

One Christmas, Two Scenarios
"To me, you are perfect."
"To me, you are present perfect."

Once upon a time, there were Adam and Noah.
Their story was direr than the Messiah.
One got robbed of a fraction of rib; 
The other suffered tides of rips. 

For one, God was the Creator; 
For the other, He was the Destroyer. 
The former wore a twig of fig in shame; 
The latter waited for leaves of olive in pain. 
Adam in Eden was a namer; 
Noah from the ark was a collector. 
They, with events and changes, 
Planted a Tree of Knowledge.
This Tree of Knowledge had a trunk of rock;
It grew a golden bough and a cowhide bark.
Our ancestors stayed under the lofty arbor,
Amazed at this creation of mental labor.
Then, from above struck a thunder.
The Tree was hit and split asunder.
Yet, in time it spread its ruby seeds,
And they drifted onto the vast sea.
Many of them became fodder for a whale,
But two, fortunately, got blown by a gale.
They caught the attention of one blue bird,
And finally settled onto some green turf.
The warbler sang the tale to a bard,
And the old man retold it to a jock.
The garish jock listened in tears,
So he passed the story from ear to ear.
Meanwhile, the seeds started to sprout,
By the late June, they reached the cloud.
Due to their grand stature and august carriage,
The blue bird built a nest among the foliage.
So now we had two trees of the same kind.
Apart as their boles were, their branches twined.
Upon the harvest, they yielded peach of luck,
Pear of brotherhood, and orange of love.
(To Be Continued)

 

突然想起大學教授以前在課堂分享的親身經驗：
由於老師作風洋派，連家裡電話答錄機都用英文。有天，她回到家，照慣例收聽留言，卻有一則另人噴飯的短訊等著她：
"I am not home. Please leave a message after the beep sound." （我不在家。嗶一聲後，請留言。）
「這是哩講啥小？！」接著掛電話。

Sick of Bishop's "One Art"? Try this!
The art of hatred isn't hard to master; 
so many things seem filled with the intent 
to be hated that their hatred is no disaster. 
Hate something every day. Embrace the fluster 
of hated door keys, the hour badly spent. 
The art of hatred isn't hard to master. 
Then practice hating farther, hating faster: 
places, and names, and where it was you meant 
to travel. None of these will bring disaster. 
I hated my friends' duplicity. And look! my last, or 
next-to-last, of three loved friends went. 
The art of hatred isn't hard to master. 
I hated two cities, lovely ones. And, vaster, 
some realms I owned, two rivers, a continent. 
I miss them, but it wasn't a disaster. 
---Even hating you (the joking voice, a gesture 
I love) I shan't have lied. It's evident 
the art of hatred's not too hard to master 
though it may look like (Write it!) like disaster.