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Today I killed an ingenue.
They say she died young.
I am the one to blame.
Hell to that gory bat.
A lecher, a murderer, or a monster?
No, I am less a demon than a leech.
She begged for immortality.
I granted her wish.
Some lad claimed to save other damsels in distress.
For the love of humanity, he became a hero.
With garlic, a prick, and a cross,
He now challenged me.
Tiptoeing, he wormed into my turf like a thief.
Despite his prudence, the garlic betrayed him.
Look how mighty he is!
He wielded his garlic like a tawdry necklace.
"Out you bloody vampire," he quavered.
Blandishing his weapons, he demanded my presence.
That's rude.
Doesn't he know how to say "please"?
I couldn't help laughing,
For I am a Chinese vampire.
Not afraid of the cross, I'm even fond of garlic.
So, I left a note on a trunk:
"Nice outfit! You drag queen.
The knight armor is out of style.
Be careful of the prick, though.
You may hurt yourself."
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